So I woke up this morning, got my vital signs checked, laid down for another hour, and got stuck in both arms…again. In some ways, I’m being extremely nice about this because it is a sister that is doing it, but I’ve definitely got to make sure she only sticks me in my right arm. After being poked for blood, I washed up and went into the room designated as the eating room for the
lab rats volunteers(that never gets old). Upon entering the room, a discussion was in process that allowed me to immediately handle the disturbance of the night prior.
I used the Quentin Tarantino history of using the “n-word” in his movies as my starting point. Immediately, it was understood where I was going. It is never cool for a non-black person to ever use that word. I feel that it could have been left alone, but I do understand the need for communication and dialogue among members of opposite ethnicity when the time presents itself. And ultimately, it is cathartic to express your angst.
A couple of hours after that discussion, a few of us met up in the area we are calling the ‘sun room”. Our sleeping quarters don’t provide us any sunlight, and during the day this seems to be our grove of sorts. The sun comes down into our pores through a window on the roof, and the room itself is spacious enough for us to kick around a soccer ball. The conversation traveled light speed through various topics such as revolt versus revolution, anarchy, music as a form of communication, what it means to be a radical, and the criminal as an agent for change. Our critiques of society seemed to converge well. I felt that to be socially uncanny, Which can cause me a slight paranioa. As a media analyst, it is difficult for me to seperate the thought from where it originated, and I’m always asking myself if we think alike because we have been programmed alike.
I’ve been extremely social lately, and actually I’ve been in pretty much every major discussion that has occurred here. I don’t necessarily feel I’m representing for the American Black any more than I feel those who are caucasian are representing for their ethnicity or race. I do recognize the class differences, and the attitudes inherent in that particular consciousness. Those that think they are better tend to stick to themselves more. I could be wrong, but there is a pattern that I’m sure I’m not overanalyzing, or hypothesizing incorrectly.
I’ve learned a great deal about communal behavior, and true radical thought. Which is strange, because I didn’t expect I would learn much through my experience here. From what has been admitted, none of us really thought we’d be as social as we have been. Which is ironic, because we all sort of made sure to break the ice rather early in the study.It is no strange thing the beginning of the word “community” is shared by the word “communicate”. In so many ways that is all we really have. We play cards together, we read together, we eat together, we watch movies together, and none of this was by force, and none of it would have occurred if we weren’t interested in the furthering of the extended conversations we share. Total strangers that seem to share a common appreciation for knowledge, and a need for money, obviously, but definitely a respect for learning and living from that place of new thinking.
My vital signs have been terrific. My blood pressure is down, and I’ve even managed to lose a couple pounds. Still not feeling any of the symptoms of either bacteria strand. My more suspicious side is still looking for a camera in the air ducts and vents. Just not willing to accept it as is. But who knows.